Tag: Mother

Sadly Hanging up My Dance Shoes to Embrace Motherhood

lwjoefmy

Becoming a mother brings beautiful yet challenging experiences. For me, it came with a decision that shook my entire sense of self—hanging up my dance shoes to embrace motherhood. After years of performing and dedicating my life to being a professional ballet dancer, something I loved since childhood, stepping away didn’t just involve logistics; it felt like losing a part of my identity.

Dance Shoes to Embrace Motherhood - Harriet Mills performing Giselle
Performing as ‘Giselle’ during my 10-year long career with the Staatsballet Karlsruhe

The Decision to Step Away

For years, my husband and I lived apart, navigating the challenges of a long-distance relationship while pursuing our passionate careers. When our daughter entered the world, I knew I needed to change. It was no longer just the two of us—our family needed to come together under one roof. While the thought of continuing to dance professionally tugged at my heart, I felt a stronger pull to build a home with my husband and child.

Read more: Sadly Hanging up My Dance Shoes to Embrace Motherhood

Losing and Rediscovering My Identity

This decision wasn’t easy. Dance defined me more than just a career. From the age of 11, I trained rigorously, perfected my craft, and turned my passion into a successful career. Leaving the stage meant losing a part of me that I thought defined who I was. It represented the thing I excelled at, the constant in my life. Without it, I felt lost.

And I know many mothers can relate to this feeling. We give so much of ourselves to our families that, somewhere along the way, we can forget who we are. We lose sight of the person we were before becoming “mummy.” For me, stepping away from dance compounded that sense of losing myself in more ways than one.

Dance Shoes to Embrace Motherhood- Harriet Mills performing as Anna Karenina
Performing the mad scene from Reginaldo Oliveira’s ‘Anna Karenina‘ – Salzburg Landestheatre

Embracing the New Chapter

The combination of these two huge life changes definitely shook me but I knew time would be the best healer. And as time passed, I started to see this period of transition as an opportunity. Albeit a challenging and quite daunting one, but never the less one that I am growing with.

While I stepped away from my identity as a professional dancer, I also gained the space to rediscover who I am outside of that role. I’ve had the chance to explore new paths, to rebuild my work life in a way that still connects me to the dance world I love so much. Teaching has allowed me to stay close to my wonderful husband and daughter and connected to dance. I share my passion with others and am slowly rebuilding a new identity as both a mother and a mentor.

I’m still finding my way, but I’m learning that it’s okay to let go of one chapter to embrace another. Even though I have hung up my dance shoes for motherhood, through this journey, I’ve discovered that losing yourself doesn’t have to be permanent—it can be the beginning of finding yourself again in new and unexpected ways.

With love,

Harriet

The Power of Family and Personal Growth: A Year of Reflection

ABL_Dance

This past week marked my birthday—a time for reflection on the past year, which has been filled with immense change, growth, and new experiences. It’s an opportunity to look back on how far we’ve come and to feel grateful for the support systems that have helped us along the way. As I look back, I’m reminded of the importance of family, friends, and positive influences in our lives, especially in the context of balancing a demanding career in ballet with the joys and challenges of motherhood.

The Support of Family and Friends

Family support can make a world of difference, particularly when balancing a professional career and personal life. I have been fortunate to have a wonderful support system, including my husband, parents, sibling and a circle of positive friends who have become like family to me. They provide the encouragement and understanding needed to navigate the many phases of life.

However, not everyone is always surrounded by family. Sometimes, we find ourselves in situations where our immediate circle may not provide the encouragement or positivity we need. I remember times during my school years or even in the company, where it wasn’t easy to find a supportive environment. It’s during these moments that we need to seek out those positive influences—whether it’s a friend, teacher, or colleague who can offer a different perspective and shine a light on the situation. These relationships can help us see challenges as opportunities for growth and development.

If you’re a young dancer or someone embarking on a new journey, remember that the people you surround yourself with matter. Find those who uplift you, inspire you, and encourage you to be the best version of yourself. It’s easy to get stuck in a bubble, bringing each other down, but finding that one person who can lift you up can make all the difference.

My supportive colleagues and team of swans at the Badisches Staaststheater Karlsruhe after our last run of Swan Lake

Reflecting on a Year of Change

As I celebrated my birthday this week, I couldn’t help but reflect on the many changes that have taken place over the past year. Life is full of phases—some are wonderful, while others are challenging. But each phase brings with it an opportunity for growth and development. I’ve learned that while we can influence these changes by being proactive and driven, sometimes, change simply happens. And it’s during these moments that we have the chance to develop and grow.

Looking back over the past year, I see how much has changed in my own life. From becoming a mother to balancing a career as a dance teacher in Munich, I’ve experienced both the highs and the lows. There have been moments of exhaustion and doubt, but also moments of joy and fulfillment. Through it all, I’ve learned to embrace each phase, knowing that it’s an opportunity to learn and grow.  

Being That Person for My Daughter

Reflecting on my journey as a dancer, I’m reminded of my own mother and the role she played in my development. She was my partner, my travel buddy, my agent, and my biggest supporter. From driving me to auditions and summer schools to staying up late listening to me recount every detail of a performance, she was always there for me. Her unwavering support and encouragement were invaluable, helping me navigate the ups and downs of a career in ballet.

Now, as a mother myself, I look forward to being that person for my little girl. Whatever path she chooses, I want to be there to support her, to encourage her, and to help her navigate the many phases of life. Whether she decides to follow in my footsteps and pursue a career in dance or chooses a completely different path, I will be there to guide her, cheer her on, and help her see the beauty in every phase of her journey.

Embracing Gratitude and Looking Ahead

As I look ahead to the coming year, I’m filled with gratitude for the experiences of the past year and the lessons they have taught me. Balancing a new career with the joys of motherhood isn’t always easy, but it’s a journey filled with growth, discovery, and immense joy. I’m grateful for the support of my family and friends, for the opportunities to teach and inspire young dancers, and for the chance to continue growing both personally and professionally.

To all the young dancers reading this, know that you are not alone in your journey. We all face challenges, but it’s how we respond to them that defines us. Surround yourself with positive influences, embrace each phase of life with gratitude, and remember that every challenge is an opportunity for growth.  

Thank you for being a part of this journey with me. Here’s to another year of growth, discovery, and the joy of dance.

With Love,

Harriet xxx